


Maura

by e_dog



Category: Rizzoli & Isles
Genre: Confessions, F/F, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-30
Updated: 2015-06-30
Packaged: 2018-04-06 22:44:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4239450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/e_dog/pseuds/e_dog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hope is the one thing that drives me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Maura

**Author's Note:**

> Long day. Late night. I needed to get this out. Unbeta’d.

_Maura_

_This letter could never adequately express the fear that resides in my heart. I know that you think that I fear nothing, but that’s not true. It couldn’t be further from the abject reality that is my being. The bullets are easy. The wounds don’t phase me. But you terrify me._

_This letter is my confession._

_It doesn’t seem possible and yet you prove me wrong each and every day. Our friendship grows and twists. It seizes with the knowing comfort that we will always have the other. How is that conceivable, that your love for me knows no bounds? That your love is so rare, so forgiving and pure? It’s a love unlike any I have ever known. It’s a love that frightens me to my very core. It’s a love that only a true friend could give so freely without asking for anything in return._

_And I do love you, Maura._

_But not as a friend should love another friend. This love, it’s so different from what you have shown me, from what you have shared with me. It’s this, I must confess, is the reason I write this. The reason that I’m scared. The reason you should be scared too._

_I can’t imagine this life, any life without you._

_Will someday the stars align, give us the chance to explore this vast thing? To continue to be who we are, with the added benefit of an irreplaceable faith? Faith that our paths will not only travel side by side, but intersect when the world requires it of us._

_Hope is the one thing that drives me._

_I watch you with potential suitors, a resentful scowl forming a thin line across my lips. Something you must interpret as distrust. How could there be jealousy in my expression? You observe me with other men, a painted smile on your face. A sadness residing in your eyes when reality sinks in that maybe, just maybe something will finally come between us._

_But if there’s anything worth doing in this world, it’s being honest with oneself. No matter what or who enters my life, I will never let anything destroy what we have built. I will never give up. I wish that you could see the real me in the same way that I can see the real you._

_This world could not measure the impact of your words, your laugh, your eyes._

_This world, our world is the place in which I reside._

_Don’t let this confession burden you with a sense of obligation. I don’t imagine that your feelings are attune with mine own. I don’t even give myself the gratification._

_Just never stop loving me._

_And I will never stop loving you._

You crumple up the letter.

An act that you have performed so many times before. You’ve written perhaps hundreds of letters like the one you just discarded. Except maybe this time . . . Maybe this one is different and you frantically retrieve it from the wastebasket. You spread it desperately across your desk, kneading out the crinkles and the folds. Satisfaction overwhelms you as the ink on the page had apparently dried, leaving it free of smudges. Still legible should you gather the courage needed to slip it into an envelope.

But then you notice the tears. You notice how your body warms at the thought of her and then you rip the letter to shreds.

No, this one was no different than the rest.

A knock on the door startles you. The hour is late and only two people come to mind. It’s either your mother or. . .

“Maura,” you say.

“Jane,” she says, holding a folded piece of paper in her hands. “I’m sorry for waking you. . .”

“I wasn’t asleep,” you say. “So. . .something new about the case?”

You’re amused to witness the sheepish grin that spreads her face. She quickly shakes her head no, before shoving the piece of paper into your arms. It’s rare, but your friend seems to lack the words that her expression would suggest she is desperately searching for. Instead of something complex, she opts for the simple.

”Please, open it?”

It’s only now do you notice that the two of you are still standing in the doorway. It should feel awkward, but something akin to anticipation lingers in the air.

You open the paper.

_This letter could never adequately express the fear that resides in my heart._

The tears are in your eyes again as you look at her and she at you. You step back as she answers your unspoken plea to come inside. Once the door shuts, you let the letter fall to the floor.

You don’t need to read what you now already know.

She will never stop loving you.


End file.
